Out Of The Blue (Bear Truck).



Written by Esquire
February 8, 2012






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Denver, the sunshine state...gorgeous. I've been eating really healthy lately. And then I went to America. I'm not food truck fan per say I prefer being served my meal, and eating indoors. However, any excuse to get out of a trade show for a few moments was reason enough to go slumming. The slider and grill cheese from Blue Bear Truck was really something else. As were the garlic fries included in this combo. Also of note was a delicious hot mustard which we dipped the fries in because clearly the garlic parmesan rub wasn't enough. To understand an American, one must eat like an American...I should be American.

Blue Bear Truck. Denver, CO.
      Out of the Blue - Julian Casablancas
 
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Mama Said There’s Mayonaise Like This, There’s Mayonaise Like This Mama Said.



Written by Esquire
August 23, 2010






I was watching Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations the other day, and they happened to be making aioli in a small kitchen in France. An older french lady showed Anthony of few of her family secrets on how to achieve the perfect aioli. The old bat went through some serious steps to get it perfect.  By the way, Aioli is absolutely nothing like mayonnaise when made properly.

Aioli was initially used among commoners and peasants. Anyone poor as shit only had vegetables to eat, so they would slather it on everything to add flavor. Here in North America where we misinterpret and pretty much fuck up everything aioli  is often a little different. For the record: adding ketchup, mustard, or hot sauce to mayonnaise does not make it aioli. I'm not one to judge, but after seeing how it was done in the old country,  I felt perhaps I could no longer return to the sub-par mayo concoctions I once loved.

Longing for a solution to this madness, I contacted my friend who is very wise, and also happens to be rather charming.  I've always marveled at his ability to take lovers of all varieties.  He seems to show no preference when it comes to the appearance of his dates. His response to my conundrum: Do as I do. Love them all the same.

I suppose Aioli is no exception. I must learn to love all different qualities.  Thank you for your advice my sweet Dieter. What a gentle lover you truly must be.

      Mama Said.

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Hurts So Good. Come On Mayonnaise Make It Hurt So Good.



Written by Esquire
January 31, 2010






The greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing the world to eat fries dipped in mayonnaise.- Job 2:19.

If the inventor of mayonnaise is receiving residuals of any kind for his creation, surely he is absolutely killing it these days. Fried potatoes and mayo.  This combination of grease and fat is next level shit. We as human beings should all be very proud.  You would imagine these products would be a tough sell in this fragile market of Weight Watching and Biggest Loser-ing. Apparently this is not at all the case. At Fritz they even have several different flavors of mayonnaise to top your fritz.

Biggest Loser Couples -Its changing lives. I actually have a Hockey-like Pool going for this show. Each gambler picks the contestant they think will loose the most weight by the finale. Winner takes all. Just to clarify, Im serious. I have 10$ on Sam, one of the Samoan cousins on Team Grey. I cheer for him every Tuesday. I wish misery and failure to all that stand in his our way. When Sam wins a challenge, I feel proud. When he weeps, sadness fills my heart.  If I were on the Moon of Pandora, Sam would be my Avatar.

Note: I originally started watching The Biggest Loser in hopes it would motivate me to be more active. Regrettably all it ever does is make me crave chicken fingers.

Fritz European Fry House. Vancouver.

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Appies All The Time. Snack well, friend.