Please Please Cheese. Let Me Get What I Want This Time.

Written by Esquire
October 8, 2011


For once in my life, can I please get served a proper Nacho dish? It's no secret that in order to achieve a successful Nacho one must layer the cheeses and ingredients accordingly. If you don't use a layering technique, it renders 85% of the dish useless.  On top of that, almost every establishment has the nerve of charging $20 a plate and of course $4 extra for a thimble of gaucamole. Fuck you Pubs everywhere. Save yourself the trouble and go buy a bag of Dorritos. At least they are seasoned. Despite my love for the appetizer, I almost never order nachos. But alas, finally I have found a worthy dish. My beloved Mexican friends at Salsa and Agave, but of course.  Their layering of the cheeses is incredible. They even use that white Mexican cheese that I like so much. They serve the meat on the side for personalized distribution. To top it off they are only $10. I promise you will be pleased with their chos, bros. Lord knows it would be the first time.

Note: Usually the cardinal rule is Chos before Hos. But in this case you are going to want to share. If you eat this whole dish all by yourself, then god have mercy on your soul.  In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sanct. Salsa and Agave. Vancouver, BC. [mp3j track="Please Please Please.mp3"]  

Filed Under Mexican, Nachos, Smiths
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I Ate Chos. Sub Par Chos. Four One Eight Area Codes. (Area) Area Codes (Codes).

Written by Esquire
April 14, 2010

I am fully aware the French are extremely fond of cheese, but this was some next level shit. Take a good look at the state of these nachos. Seriously, WTF? They must have used 5 pounds of cheese if they used an ounce. The few tortillas included were burnt as fuck well done, and the condiments came half full. Thats right, half full. How optimistic. Over the years I have been fortunate enough to have dined at many of the sketchiest ski resorts this great nation has to offer. Seldom compare to Mont St. Sauveur's cafeteria.

At one point my associate Jon went in for a chip, only to find the entire amount of melted cheese attached. As a joke he placed the cheese skin on his face, poked a hole for his tongue, and repeated "I'd fuck me" in a deep voice.  I thought it was a little weird, especially when he proceeded to  add the mangina to his performance.

Note: It was not until long after the routine whilst snacking on those very nachos that I realized Jon's act was based on that film starring Jody Foster. I think it was... Contact. It must have been either Contact or Panic Room? Regardless, two thumbs way up.

Mont. St. Sauveur. Quebec. [audio:Area Codes.mp3]

Filed Under Nachos, Quebec
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Appies All The Time. Snack well, friend.