Don’t Call My Name, Don’t Call My Name. Filibertos. I’m Not Your Babe, Im Not Your Babe. Casillo.

Most head to California for the sun and perhaps the waves. Not me dog. I go for the snacking. Of all the burritos in all of middle earth, it is the California Burrito from Flibertos that I desire most. Inside this magical two pound delight is carne asada, french fries, guacamole, cheese, salsa fresca, and hot sauce at your discretion. I wish I could have one every day. If that were possible, what a well nourished round man I would truly be. But alas, that is merely a pipe dream. For we don’t have Mexicans in Canada.

If you are familiar with the Matrix, you may recall that in act 3 our protagonist Neo eats a strange oatmeal mixture that is said to have all necessary nutrients the human body needs to sustain itself. My recent studies have found similar attributes  in the Cali burrito. By consuming only water and  a burrito for 4 faithful days in a row, I have proven the body needs nothing more, nothing less to survive under the hot California sun. The multiple bottles of wine each evening do not count, they were needed to wash down the nightly dose of Vicodin.

Note: Although I have succeeded in finding an alternative to futuristic oatmeal, I’m beginning to think perhaps eating a California Burrito each day did not exactly do wonders for my highly anticipated California beach body. Regrettably, even though I move like Neo, my physique in no way resembles Johnny Utah’s.

Chorus: Filibertos. Flibertos. Fili-fili bertos. FIli-fili bertos. God dam this is a catchy song… Only Labamba makes me  crave Mexican more.

Flibertos. Encinitas, CA.

Alejandro.

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