Im Going Back To Bali. Bali. Bali.

Written by Esquire
June 27, 2009

There is a place called Azia right by the movie theatre. They have a wide variety of  food from all over Azia. Wait, Asia? No. Azia. Right. Very clever. The dish they call the Nasi Goreng comes with a fried egg on top. I recall eating this very meal daily whilst on my travels in Indonesia so many moons ago. We also tried the Szechuan Ribs, which were quite nice. On the special menu was a Tuna Sashimi Trio.  3 types of tuna, 3 sauces,  2 dudes. Also worth ordering. Next time I will check to see if they serve Indonesia's most recognizable product,  and finest Pilsner: Bintang. They must, their menu is huge. I could eat here for weeks and still not try everything. Impressive. I am impressed, but to be honest I would rather go back to Bali.

Azia. Vancouver, BC.



Filed Under Azia, Ribs, Rice, Sushi, Vancouver
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You, Remind Me Of Home-made Pizza.

Written by Esquire
June 25, 2009


This is one of my go-to homemade pizzas. I call it the Green Dragon. Its hotter then balls. Jerk Chicken, spinach, green peppers, jalapeno peppers, cayenne peppers, onions. You can actually breath fire after you  eat it. Very reminiscent to that of an actual Dragon. A Green one in fact. What many will find fascinating is it contains almost no fat, and is made with Whole wheat Pita bread and light mozzarella cheese. I can almost hear myself loosing weight each time I eat one. The problem is I usually eat two.

[audio:you remind me of home..mp3]

Filed Under Jerk Chicken, Pizza
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Sushi Shooter. McGavin

Written by Esquire
June 20, 2009


If you ever find yourself at Honjin Sushi, this little gem is a must order. The Sushi Shooter is one of the finest pieces of tuna in Vancouver. As soon as your seated order  two each to get the ball rolling. If you have not had enough tuna after those shots, be sure to order the Roundhouse roll. Its pretty much the very same tuna, only this time  with lemon over an avocado roll.

Honjin also has the best beef sashimi in town. Patience, I will leave that report up to my Tataki expert Desmondo Gelato. He claims that even though its technically meat, Honjin's  beef sashimi could easily be served as a dessert. Stay tuned for a full once over of Honjin's appies menu. They have some real bangers. Not anthems. Honjin Sushi. Yaletown, Vancouver.

Filed Under Honjin, Sushi, Vancouver
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I’ve Got One Hand In My West Coast Pocket.

Written by Esquire
June 17, 2009


These little pockets are amazing. I don't even eat salmon, or so I thought. An ideal combination of the salty sweets, the casing is some sort of soya based tofu pocket. Sweet in flavor, yet the soy and wasabi adds a salty taste. The Cactus Club has quite a few items on their appies menu that are worth trying. In fact,  eating "appies style" is pretty much mandatory at the Club, as they have a plethora to choose from. Their staff are certainly something to be desired. As are their celebrity-like cliental. I just saw the guy who looks like Magnum P.I in there  not more then a week ago. I think he's in a Jack FM commercial. His shit is blowing up.

Cactus Club. BC.

Filed Under Cactus Club, Sushi, Vancouver
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If you like Pizza Lombardi’s. And Getting Caught In The Rain.

Written by Esquire
June 15, 2009

I was in NY city a while back. First timer. That place is nothing like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles portrayed it to be. I was expecting some seedy areas, garbage in alleyways, dudes in leather jackets hanging on stoops etc. Apparently it has not been that way for several years now. Rudy Juliani is said to have done a real bang up job cleaning up the city. I can concur, that place is like a movie set, and the people are lovely. During happy hour (all day, every day, 11 to 8pm) we would stumble upon a pizzeria or two while being day drunk.

Lombardi's claims to be America's First Pizzeria,  as stated on their plaque. (Plaque? spelt same as the teeth kind?) They still use the original oven from 1905. You can hardly tell, looks brand new (see photo). The pizza's were nice. Not off the charts amazing, but very good. Although, there were others on this tour that impressed us more. Either way it was great to visit where it all began. If you are religious and actually believe in this Jesus character, then It was the equivalent of you going to see a Manger in Bethlehem.

Lombardi's. NewYork, NY.

[audio:pina coladas.mp3]

Filed Under New York, Pizza
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Goodbye, Karubi Tuesday.

Written by Esquire
June 14, 2009

karubiFor upwards of one week, we will be showcasing appies exclusively from Honjin's menu.

Today's feature is the Karubi. This word "Karubi", clearly Japanese for "tender and of supreme flavor". At just $4.95, every table is certainly priced in (thats poker language, meaning: committed). Im not quite sure how long they marinade the beef for. Judging from the flavor overload at first bite, its probable the marination process begins whilst the animal is still alive. Try it. You will be entertained. Are you not entertained?

Honjin. Yaletown, Vancouver.

[audio:Ruby Tuesday.mp3]

Filed Under Honjin, Sushi, Vancouver
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Poutine And The Blowfish

Written by Esquire
June 5, 2009


It was a long evening after the Blue Jays game in Toronto. We were drunk, tired, and sweaty. We were in need of something equally as filthy. Hooker Harvey's was considered, but quickly ruled out as too filthy for what we were after. With me was a lady of French descent.  Her instinctive skills set us on a  quest for poutine. Poutine? I thought. Her slender physique would have had me think otherwise. Smoke's Poutinerie is a new spot that just opened up on Adelaide St. They have so many different poutine flavors, it's offensive. The dude in line behind us looked like Hootie from the Blowfish. My squinting eyes saw "Montreal Smoked Meat" on the chalk board. I proceeded. It was as delicious as it was gluttonous. I still can't tell if this was the best or worse eating decision of my career. It made me feel like how a lady of the night must feel after getting dropped back off at the Harvey's. I digress.

Smoke's Poutinerie. Toronto, ON.

You Can Find Me In The Club. Sandwich.

Written by Esquire
June 4, 2009

It was the W hotel. September. Not a cloud in the sky. The sun was blazing. The sweat off my brow reminded me of a time when I thought rap would never die. I ordered a club sandwich, poolside no less. When the snack arrived I couldn't help but notice it was more beautiful then the waitress who brought it to me. With a single glance it was clear this sandwich was off the heels, hard off the heels. It had the basic ingredients of the club sandwich. Turkey breast, bacon, tomato, lettuce, etc. However, in this particular sandwich there was something different. First off all, each piece of bread was delicately hand grilled. Inside was a fine layer of avacado, and a fried egg! As I proceeded It felt much like a dream. This was the single greatest sandwich I had ever tasted. Then I got to thinking.... had the 5 Coors Lights I had previously consumed that very morning altered my taste buds to such a degree? Was my judgement compromised? I may never know the answer to those questions. Either way, thank god I took a picture. White people rarely do cool shit like this to their sandwiches.

Note: With a bullet,  #1 on the all time on the sandwich list: The W's Club.

W Hotel. San Diego, CA.

[audio:In Da Club.mp3]

Filed Under San Diego, Sandwich
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Actual Red Hot Chili Peppers. Not The Musical Ensemble

Written by Esquire
June 2, 2009

An associate of mine (he does gardening and other sorts) recently decided to grow hot peppers. Lets call him Senior for now. Senior lived beside a Portuguese man for years. After watching his neighbor struggle in the garden with a poor crop, Senior decided to give it a shot. As apprentice's often do, the time had come where he surpassed his master. From a small planter on a roof top balcony in downtown Toronto, Senior was able to produce over 400 peppers his first time around, earning him the name Greene-thumba (an ancient Swahili word meaning "to flourish").  In the crop were Jalapeno, Serrano, and Cayenne peppers. Following strict instruction from Senior's Italian grandmother, we picked them, cut them up, and bottled these bitches in only the finest of olive oil (available exclusively at the local Dominion). I cannot reveal the precise method of preparation as it comes direct from the old country, and I was blindfolded during steps 4 and 5.  Regardless, these beauties are a must on pizza, pasta, anything and everything. It you have the space to grow anything, I advise you give it a try. Sunlight is the key. Senior Greene-thumba, you make good peppers.

Filed Under Peppers, Pizza, Toronto
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Of Montreal. Smoked Meat

Written by Esquire
June 1, 2009


Montreal, the city of love. So many things to eat, so little time. Montreal specializes in many things, but for now I shall focus on the delicatessen. Montreal has the best in the nation, including non other then Swartz's Deli. Its so famous, its actually infamous. Check it out if you ever make it EST. It's not terribly far from Montreal's most noted landmark,  Club Super Sex. Due to the success of Swartz's, their exported cured products can even be found in B.C, a land where it's frowned upon to eat meat. If you order the sandwich, it comes with several pounds of Montreal smoked meat, and only two slices of bread. Instead order the platter, make many a sandwich, and enjoy the feast with a friend and/or frenchmen of your choosing. Boy those Hebrew's sure know how to cure their meats. I considered converting once.

Swartz's Deli. Montreal.

[audio:Of Montreal.mp3]

Appies All The Time. Snack well, friend.